One Year On
by CBloom2
Summary: Pure fluff in remembrance of the crash that probably got us all watching Casualty again! Just an excuse the make the boys cry once more - ha ha.


**So we all know what's coming up - the first anniversary of the crash and Jeff's death - and seeing as though our favourite brothers are not in the next episode (so we're waiting another 2 weeks before we see them) I am throwing down the gauntlet to all our amazing writers to write a story centered around the anniversary.**

 **This is mine. It's a one shot full to the brim of sugary fluff! You'll see what I mean.**

 **As ususal I don't own anyone you recognise - if I did Cal and Ethan would be in the show every week (who needs real life!).**

 **One Year On**

Dr Caleb Knight was just about to take a mouthful of longed for coffee when the door to the staff room flew open to reveal a flustered looking Dixie. She looked round the room, her eyes resting on Cal, "Hey Cal, just the man. Have you seen Ethan at all? I've just dropped a patient off and I was wondering...well, wondering how he's getting on today."

Cal sighed deeply as Dixie walked in, then shook his head, "I haven't seen him since we got here this morning - I think he's trying to keep busy."

Dixie nodded as she sat next to the young doctor, "I know the feeling. Has he been alright lately?"

"He's been quiet - well quieter than usual. He's not been sleeping right for the last few nights. He thinks I don't know, but I hear him wandering around the flat..." he fell silent as he remembered the night before where he heard his little brother sobbing in his room. Knowing that the younger man would not want to be disturbed, Cal had just laid there and listened to his brother's sorrow, "I think he still feels responsible in some way," Cal explained to the sad looking paramedic.

"I wish he didn't," she told him, "I blamed myself for months - thinking that I should've made sure he followed me out when I got Ash...but...well it was just a tragic accident."

"I know that, you know that, but I'm not sure that Ethan got the memo!" Cal replied, with a wry smile.

Dixie chuckled, "Well, I've got to go. You coming to the pub tonight? Drinks on Jeff."  
"Wouldn't miss it, and thanks Dixie...for looking out for my brother," he told her sincerely as she left him to ponder the workings of his brother's mind.

"Ok, this is David Sanderson, involved in a RTC, he was driving..." everything else that was relayed to him completely went over his head. All he heard was RTC - he was driving and he was transported back to a year ago. His breath caught and his chest began to hurt, right where the life saving incision had been made. He'd managed to make it to Resus with the patient, thankful that Zoe had been on hand to actually listen to the paramedics. He knew that really he shouldn't be there that day - his head wasn't in the game, but he hadn't wanted to sit in the flat all day with his own thoughts. He glanced over to the other bed and saw his brother, busy with another patient, for which he was glad, he didn't want any awkward conversations.

"Ethan! Dr Hardy!" he heard his name being called.

He looked to Zoe, who seemed to be watching him in exasperation, "Are you actually with us today Dr Hardy?" she asked, noticing that the normally together young doctor was today anything but!

"Yes, of course, sorry, what...?" he stammered.

"Get some bloods from him..." She continued to reel off what she wanted from him, with him nodding hoping that he remembered everything.

He leaned over to get the oxygen mask when the pain in his chest made itself known once more, causing him to flinch and wince, "Are you alright Dr Hardy?" Zoe asked him with concern. She could see that all was not well with the young man, and she was well aware of what day it was.

Ethan looked to her, nodding his head, "Fine - just a spasm," he told her, hoping that she would let it go.

He continued to work without noticing that Zoe was watching his every move. Every time he reached for something, the pain would return. After one particularly loud hiss of pain Zoe made a decision, "Dr Knight?" she called to the older man who was writing in his notes, "Have you finished with your patient?"

"Sent for a CT and xrays..." he told her.

"Good, I would like you to take Dr Hardy to the staff room for a break..." she held her hand up to Ethan, "I'm well aware Dr Hardy that you haven't had a break since you started at 7am and it is now 2pm - you will be no good to us if you collapse due to low blood sugar."

Ethan suddenly found the floor very interesting as he became aware of his brother's presence, "Make sure he gets something to eat and a drink. I will send someone for you when your patient gets back, " she watched as Cal took position next to the younger man, as Ethan let out a big sigh, "Ethan I'm not completely clueless, I know what day it is today, but working yourself to a frazzle will not help matters. Now go and get something to eat," she finished off kindly.

Ethan meekly followed his brother to the staff room and sank heavily into the sofa while Cal made his some toast and a coffee. He sat himself down next the the smaller man watching closely as Ethan shifted into a sitting position, "What hurts?" he asked, noticing Ethan's pinched features.

Ethan contemplated making something up, but in actual fact, he was to tired to dance about the problem, "My chest...where you performed..."

Cal nodded his acknowledgement, "But it's all in my head," Ethan finished.

Cal's face creased in confusion, causing Ethan to smile, "I mean that because of the day that it is and the fact that I haven't been having the best nights sleep over the last few days, I'm getting pain where the incision was to remind me of what I did."

Cal shook his head, "Here we got again. How many times Ethan, it wasn't your fault - surely you know that?"

"I go over it, over and over again Cal in my head - what could I have done differently? Why didn't I see that other car? Everything has been whirling around in my head and I can't make sense of it," he told his brother, tears shining in his eyes.

Cal put his arm around him, "There is no sense to be made. It was a tragic accident, nothing more, nothing less. Look, I've got to get back to work, but I don't want to see you stepping foot out of this room for the next half hour at least. Finish you food, take a few minutes before you come out again."

"Yes, thanks Cal, I will. Are we going to the pub later?" he asked.

Cal looked surprised, "Yes, Dixie asked earlier - celebrate Jeff's life and the lives he saved."

"Good, yes that's good..." he mumbled as he sat back against the back of the sofa and closed his eyes. Cal smiled as he left his brother to his devices. He felt very proud of his brother as he closed the door behind him - he seemed to be coping well.

Ethan, meanwhile, had gotten so comfortable that he had drifted off into an uneasy sleep. He was jolted out of his slumber by Lofty, who had slammed his locker door closed.

"What time is it Lofty?" he croaked, suddenly aware that his cheeks were wet.

"End of shift," the curly haired nurse answered.

"What?" Ethan jumped up so fast that Lofty had to dash over to steady the young doctor.

"Careful. Zoe decided to let you sleep, seeing as you hadn't had any proper sleep over the last few nights..."

Ethan looked surprised that Lofty knew such things, but realised that Cal must have told Zoe so that she would let him sleep.

"Sleep well little brother?" Cal's cheery (if a little forced) voice filtered through the room.

"Mmmm," was all Ethan managed.

"Good, ready for the pub then?" he questioned the two people in the room.

"I was born ready!" Lofty chuckled.

Half a hour later, there wasn't a dry eye in the house as Dixie concluded her speech and toast to Jeff "To Jeff," they had all chorused.

As everyone began to start up new conversations, Ethan suddenly got to his feet and cleared his throat to get their attention, "Ahem, sorry...guys...can I just have a couple of minutes..."

Everyone turned towards the young doctor, who suddenly felt very warm under their scrutiny "I erm, well I won't say much..."

"That'll be a first," Cal joked, causing a ripple of laughter through the group.

"We've spoken about Jeff and the legacy that he has left in his wake - but I would just like to mention something a little more personal to me. It's no secret that me and Cal didn't always get along, but recently that has improved. Since the crash, Cal has been amazing. He's been there for me even when I didn't realise that I needed him. I actually can't imagine my life without him once more - like when we were kids - so I'd like to say a massive thank you to Jeff, for saving me, for allowing me to reconnect with my brother..." he turned towards Cal now, raising his glass towards him, "And to Cal, thank you for being there - for being my big brother..." he raised his glass in a toast towards the older man who couldn't look at him.

"Awww that's sweet," he heard Robyn say.

"You may kiss the bride!" Lofty shouted as some chuckled and others wiped away more tears.

A strangled sob broke through the merriment, so the group quickly fragmented, knowing that the two brothers needed their space. Ethan stoop awkwardly in front of his brother, whose head was still bent while he tried to get his emotions in check. Then the younger man bent over and gently kissed Cal's head as the older man grabbed hold of his arms and pulled him down onto a stool opposite him.

"You don't have to thank me," he croaked, "You never have to thank me, you're my brother and no matter what's gone on before, that will never change. Last year when I thought..." he couldn't on - a lump formed in his throat.

"I know..." Ethan breathed, flashes of his own memories of that day causing him to catch his breath. Suddenly, he clutched at his chest as the piercing pain returned once more.

"Ethan?" Cal looked up, his red ringed eyes full of concern.

"I'm fine - it's not real, it's just a flashback to the crash," he assured him as he looked round noticing that one or two of their friends looked anxiously their way. He offered them a placating smile, then turned back to his brother, "You ready for home?"

Cal drank the last mouthful of his beer, "Yeah - come on Nibbles. Last one home buys take away and wine!" He chuckled as he jumped from his seat while putting his hands on Ethan's shoulders making sure that he stayed seated. As Cal dashed from the pub, Ethan laughed at his brother's antics - they'd made it through the first year!

 **This was another one of those stories that sounded better in my head. Anyway I'm sure you'll tell me what you think, you're always fantastic reviewers! Looking forward to what I hope is a plethera of Cal/Ethan stories to keep us going until we see them again.**


End file.
